My Weakness
by kaitlin.perkins42
Summary: Mulder and Scully are on the run, trying to create a new future. Will they be able to meld their old and new lives together, or will the past come back to haunt them? Immediately after "The Truth", and continues on after that. Spoilers for any episodes.
1. To Build a Home

Title: To Build a Home  
Rating: R  
Disclaimer: X-files belong not to me, but to the all powerful C-man. Please don't sue!  
Summary: Mulder and Scully are on the run, trying to evade the government after "The Truth". New adventures await them, but maybe more than X-Files are in store?  
Spoilers: Any and all X-Files episodes, FTF, IWTB

* * *

Dana Scully woke up and shook her drying hair out of her eyes. She wasn't sure how long she had been lying next to her ex-FBI partner, Fox Mulder, in the motel room, sleeping off the terrors of the past week or so. She found her mind struggling to believe everything that had happened. Slowly sitting up, trying to move Mulder too much, she rubbed her eyes and took stock. The robe she was wearing was too big, but the terry cloth was soft against her dry skin. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine where her son was. No - their son now. Now that Mulder was back, she could finally call William theirs. But now William was gone. A great sense of sadness and guilt welled in the pit of her stomach; William was her one chance at being a mother, and she loved him with all her heart. But that was why she gave him up, wasn't it? Still, the look on Mulder's face told her he would desperately miss the chance to be a father, if only for the few months Scully had been a mother. She tried not to blame herself, but it was hard.

Scully reclined against the headboard, and looked down at the sleeping Mulder. It was probably the most comfortably he'd slept in a long time. She wasn't sure how long he had been running, it had been so extended a period of time, she had stopped marking the days and weeks and months. Recalling the day when she held a young William and watched Mulder shower in her bathroom she felt that had been the closest they had ever gotten to being a family. The fact that he had seen his son gave her little consolation. But there was some.

Mulder's hands were tucked between his thighs, his knees bent towards his chest, like she had found him so many times in that jail cell. She bit her lower lip before shaking him. "Mulder? Mulder, wake up." He groaned and smacked her hand. She did feel bad, doing this. She thought it a near crime to wake an insomniac from sleep. But she had too. It was 1 in the morning, so they had to get moving soon. "Come on Mulder, get up." She pecked his arm, it was muscular - most likely from all the running he had done. He rolled to face away from her. "Let me be."

"Mulder, you need to get up," she told him, before rising from the bed to walk over to the bag Monica had packed for her. She pulled a pair of blue cotton underwear with a matching bra, a grey t-shirt and some jeans. It wasn't FBI standard, but then again, neither was she. She shucked the robe and pulled on her underwear, then as she was clipping the bra in the front, about to turn it around, Mulder cleared his throat. "An early morning picture? Scully, you should have told me to throw away my tapes!"

She giggled as she finished putting it on, "You mean those ones you _don't _own."

He frowned as he sat up in bed, biting his lips, "I don't think we own anything anymore."

She nodded her head then walked over to sit next to him. "You need to take a shower. I don't want to be driving for hours through the night with a guy who smells terrible." He nodded at her before rising off the bed. He looked back at her, "You want an early morning show too, Scully?" He teased her, starting to undo his jeans.

"No thank you, Mulder. I like my men clean. Maybe tonight." She winked at him before he walked into the bathroom. She pulled on her jeans, wriggling to pull them past her hips. They fit alright, but since William, most things had been a squeeze over the hips. She froze. She really had to stop thinking about him, it broke her heart every single time she did it. She buttoned the jeans and started to dig through the bag for deodorant. Nothing. Maybe Doggett had packed some in Mulder's bag. She walked over to the dresser where he had stashed his black duffle bag and started digging through it. Boxers, jeans, t-shirts, toothpaste, deodorant. "Yes!" She pulled it out triumphantly and pulled the cap off. She sniffed it. "Maybe he won't notice that we smell the same." She put it on, then capped it and threw it back in the bag. Then she walked back to her bag, on the table and tugged her shirt on before pulling out some socks. After a while, Mulder emerged from the bathroom, much cleaner than he had been upon his entrance.

He had one of the small, white towel hung low on his hips. It barely covered all of him, and every time his took a step, he flashed a little thigh. He was digging through his bag while Scully sat on the bed, staring at her nails. "Doggett has shitty taste, Scully."

"It's not so bad."

"And you would know...how?"

"Uh...I...I see what he wears all the time, don't I!"

"I guess so." Mulder smirked and started getting dressed. After he had pulled on a pair of plaid boxers he held the towel in front of him. "These should win the award for world's smallest towels," he grinned sheepishly at her. Scully grinned back at him, before going back to her nails. "You about ready to go, Mulder?" She spoke to her thumb.

He walked over and grabbed her chin, forcing her to look up at him, then he kissed her gently on the lips, "Will be as soon as I get my shoes on."

"Do you know where we're going?" She cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah, lucky for you, I know where I'm taking you. We're going to drive north and into Canada. From there, we're going to the Caribbean, or somewhere like that. Somewhere nice."

"Money?" She liked the idea of living in a warm place, but it would be costly.

"Doggett and Rayez are slowly draining our bank accounts. They'll send both of us the money via one day express every time I call them with an address."

"When did you sort all this stuff out?"

"I did it behind your back."

_Still secretive._ She thought, a little angry. She didn't like that he was keeping stuff from her. It wasn't fair. She heard him zipping up his bag.

"Well, now, Agent Scully, it looks like you're holding me back." He grabbed her bag and tossed it over the other shoulder then picked the key up off the night stand. "Can you grab my razor? I forgot it." She nodded and ran into the bathroom then followed him out and watched him lock the door. He dropped the bags into the car on the way there. Before they went in, he stopped her by touching her shoulder lightly, "We'll stop today around 10, and switch out the car, we're paying with Doggett's credit card. Then we'll stop for the day. Ok?" She nodded before they continued in to pay the guy at the counter.

"Getting a head start, huh?" The greasy man behind the counter smiled smugly at Scully.

"Yeah," Mulder put the money and the key on the counter and left it at that. They walked back to the car and he smiled at Scully. "Let's get outta here."

She climbed into the white vehicle and buckled her seat belt on the passenger side. She didn't really know where they were going, or what the hell they were doing. All that mattered was that she was going there with Mulder and she was doing it with Mulder. That, above all things, gave her hope.

********M&S********

The road was dark and looked a little foreboding. It was a skinny back road, Mulder refused to take any actual highways, he was paranoid that the government would be after them. The dirt followed behind them in brown tendrils, rocks flying up every now and then. Scully leaned her head against the cool glass and watched herself in the side view mirror for a moment. She traced her lower lip with her finger. She crossed and uncrossed her legs then looked at the clock.

"We've been driving for almost 3 hours, Mulder."

"I know," he yawned and flicked on the radio. It was staticy and not one station came in. "Fuck."

"I have to pee, Mulder."

"What? We left just a bit ago..."

"That doesn't change the fact that I have to pee."

"You kill me Scully. Alright, but do it quick."

"I can't do it as quick as you. For me, there's squatting involved."

"Uh huh." He pulled onto the side of the road and she hopped out and ran a ways before unzipping her denim jeans and sitting down. She could feel the heat radiating from the earth. She couldn't help but be a little bothered by the possibility that a scorpion could be drowned in her pee. She finished quickly and stood, wiping her hands on her jeans. She had some hand sanitizer in her bag; Monica knew her too well. She ran back to the car, where Mulder was sitting, looking out the opposite window. He was biting his nail, "All set?"

"Yup," she shut her door and grinned at him as the vehicle accelerated back onto the road.

"So, Scully, tell me what happened while I was gone."

"What do you want to know?" She asked honestly, because there was so much to tell, she wasn't sure where to start.

"Tell me about...our son." He looked at her for a moment to gauge her reaction. She looked shocked before regaining her composure. She put a hand on her stomach as though he were still in there.

"I don't know where to start...I guess in the beginning. Well, after you left, William was mostly what I lived for. He and I spent a lot of time together. He was a brilliant child. I used to sing to him a lot. Do you remember that song that I used to hum?"

Mulder looked at her, "That Three Dog's Night song?"

"Yeah. Well, I'd sing it to him. And uh, when I had to run into work for something, my mom would watch him. He was a star Mulder. He looked like you."

"How did we know? How did we know he was mine?"

"Well, at first I figured he was yours because...well," she looked out the window as she blushed, "you were the first guy I'd had sex with in a while. But, then, that was more than 9 months before William was born, wasn't it?"

"More like a couple years before."

She nodded and returned to looking at him. "So I got him tested. It was your DNA, Mulder. Somehow, I had your baby. I don't know how. But I'm not complaining. He was the most beautiful boy I've seen, and a special gift from God. He was...my only chance." She choked back a sob and Mulder slowed the car. "Oh God, I'm so sorry. I didn't know it would make you...shit, I'm sorry Scully."

She looked at him and smiled through the tears. "No, it's ok. It's good to talk about him. Besides, he was your son, you have a right to know about him," she stopped talking and leaned her head against the window again. The drive was long, but not unbearable. Scully slept for part of it, then Mulder tapped her on the shoulder and woke her so they could eat something and switch out the cars. They drank some coffee and had breakfast in a cheap diner before going to rent a black little car: something that would blend in. Mulder agreed to check it in the next day at one of the northern locations. Then he took Scully and they checked in to a motel. He smiled at the confused cashier. Most people checked into the motel for a quicky, but Scully looked far too tired to be doing anything, and Mulder's feet were dragging too. They went into the room and Scully collapsed on the bed, not even waiting to get undressed before doing so. She struggled to get her jeans off while lying down.

"Here, let me help you with that," Mulder grinned and walked over to her. He sat next to her on the bed and started to pull down her jeans. "Ah, what sexy lingerie you have." He winked at the underwear she had on.

"Hey! I don't do anything for anyone. Don't like it, I'll undress myself." He could tell from her face she was teasing. She yawned and closed her eyes. "I slept so much, how can I be so tired, Mulder?"

"Travelling makes people tired," he answered as he tugged off the denim pants. He folded them and tucked them neatly into her bag then pulled off his own jeans and t-shirt and laid next to her, shoving the blanket down, snuggling into her neck.

"I still wanna give you that show," he whispered into her ear.

"Another night," she smiled, rolling over to press her face into his chest, trying to fight sleep. He cupped her bum and pulled her close to him.

"Sweet dreams, Scully."

She yawned, "You too, Mulder."

Mulder didn't have sweet dreams. He didn't have any dreams at all. After trying to sleep for about two hours, he finally admitted defeat. He knew watching the TV would probably wake Scully - besides with only 4 channels there was bound to be nothing but crap on. He got off the bed and she groaned a little at the loss of body heat. As compensation for his absence, he shoved his pillow, which smelled a little like his sweat and was warm from his lying on it, against her stomach. Scully immediately wrapped her arms around it. He decided a bath might relax his muscles, sore from hours at the wheel – he still hadn't let Scully do any of the driving. The warm water gushed into the tub and Mulder shut the bathroom door most of the way, in hopes that the noise wouldn't wake her. He stripped off his boxers and climbed into the steaming water.

Mulder always loved the way the water cut around his body. It felt not as though he were being enveloped, but like his body was a knife in the water. He turned his head to the side, and leaned his forehead against the cool, yellow tile. His eyes slowly closed and his thoughts drifted to Scully and William. Mulder never knew why, but thinking of Scully as a mother (of his child, no less) turned him on immensely. He only wished they could have one more chance to be a family. He knew he and Scully could get married, and adopt a baby, maybe. But there were no pregnancies, no late night cravings, nothing of that sort in store for them. And that caused them both pain.

He turned his head back to look away from the old tiles and saw Scully standing in the door.

"Did I wake you, Scully?"

She shook her head. "I couldn't sleep. I can never sleep during the day."

"You've got me beat," he joked tiredly, "I can never sleep."

She smiled sadly at him, "When I first had William, I was almost positive he was yours because he never, ever slept. I was awake at all hours of the night taking care of him." She walked over to the tub slowly, her bare feet padding on the floor. "Mind if I join you?" She nodded at him in the tub.

He nodded back and she started to take off her shirt, dropping it onto the floor before peeling off her underwear and climbing in. She lay down gently on top of him and ran her fingertips over his arms, leaning her face into the crook between his shoulder and his neck. "I'm so tired, I'm tired of everything." She could feel him nodding. "I hate this running all the time. And I don't even know where my son is." Again, he was nodding, making her feel a little aggravated. "Can you only nod?"

"No," he apologized, "I just wasn't sure what I should say." His voice sounded husky and thick, full of sleep, in her ear. She didn't reply, but her agitation melted away, and he felt her body relax on top of his. His hands danced over her back, pushing water over the pale skin, massaging her tight muscles.

After a while, when the water started to lose its heat, she pushed away from him, and smiled lightly."I have to go back to bed, now, Mulder."

"Ah, so I did wake you?"

"Maybe. Maybe not." She smiled when she left the bathroom, and, as always, left him wanting more.

The sun seeped from the room and Mulder peered through the window quietly, thoughts drifting from CSM to aliens to sleep. It was around 6:00 AM when he climbed into bed with Scully and pulled her close to him. Sleep still wasn't coming easily, but she was soft, cuddled up in the blue sheet, and she sleepily wrapped her arms around him. He nuzzled into her neck and breathed her in. He was glad to smell a Scully free of any chemical scents. She was a little earthy, a little musky, and the smell made him want to keep her with him always. He fell asleep after about half an hour, still holding her close.

She woke him 4 hours later, rubbing his back. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "What is it. Scully? I just got to sleep."

"Nothing." She kept rubbing his back, "Go back to sleep."

"Is something wrong?" Her voice had sounded a little different. He felt bad for snapping at her.

"I don't know. I've just been thinking, is all. I told you already. I hate this...running. I know we have to do it, I know we don't have a choice, I just keep thinking about all the things I'm leaving behind."

He rolled over to face her, and cupped her jaw with both hands. He rubbed just below her ears with his thumbs and she closed her eyes. "We're almost out of the states. Only...about three more days."

She visibly rolled her eyes. "I want to get out now. Why don't we just stay in Canada?"

"We have to get off the continent!"

She shook her head, "You're just paranoid, Mulder."

"Maybe." He rolled back over and put her hand on his back, signalling that she should continue the massage. Her slender fingers took up the studious task again and she kissed the nape of his neck.

"I guess...I've never been much for traveling."

Mulder smiled, even though she couldn't see, "I have."

********M&S********

They had been driving for four days before they finally crossed the border at a back road. Scully felt like an illegal immigrant, but the US couldn't know that they were staying in Canada. Mulder had some connections that could get them false Canadian citizenships, and they would go to meet them that afternoon after resting a bit and getting some food in their stomachs. Mulder had gotten a fancy room for in a nice hotel for their last stay on the run. After this, he promised Scully, they could live in a house or an apartment.

He paid with one of Frohike's credit cards, and forged an almost perfect signature. He nodded at the desk clerk before ushering Scully up to their room, carrying both of their bags. She collapsed on the bed. "Mulder, sometimes I wonder if I could ever have a baby again."

He sighed and sat next to her on the bed after shutting the door. "What do you mean Scully? That's not even possible, you of all people should know that."

She shook her head, "I know it's not. I know, as a medical doctor, that women are born with all their eggs, and they lose them. We don't make anymore. I know this, Mulder. But I still have dreams about it."

He petted her forehead, brushing light, auburn hair out of her face. "What color would you have your hair if you could pick any color?"

She looked at him inquisitively, "What do you mean?"

"Any color." He smiled a half smile.

"I don't know." She ran a shaking hand through her hair. "Black? Maybe."

"Black? I don't know Scully, I could maybe see you as a brunette, but not black hair."

"Why do you ask, Mulder?"

"Just…wondering."

Suddenly, she shot up, off the bed. She stood over him, and put her hands on her hips. "Fox Mulder, you want me to dye my hair, don't you?"

He bowed his head, shamed appropriately. "Scully, I just thought, since we're different people now, and all…"

She stopped him suddenly. "I need to call my mom. I need to. You aren't going to stop me this time Mulder."

"But Scully," he pleaded, "Her phones might be bugged."

"I won't tell her where we are, just that we're safe. I need to talk to her."

He sighed again and shook his head. "Swear to me. Not a clue about where we are. Or what we're doing."

He received a peck on his cheek as a binding contract. "I promise." Mulder nodded his satisfaction, then headed to the bathroom to take a well deserved hot shower.

"_Hello?"_

"Mom, it's me. Dana."

"_Dana! Oh thank goodness. I've been so worried about you. Are you alright? Is Fox with you? Where are you?"_

_"_Mom, I can't tell you where we are. I promised Mulder I wouldn't. Yes, he's with me. And other than being exhausted and in great need of a shower, I'm fine."

"_That's so good to hear. I was so worried about you, dear." _

"I'm fine. Not much news other than that."

_"You can't tell me anything, can you?"_

"I'm afraid not. I'm sorry mom."

_"It's alright honey. It's just great to know you're well."_

"I should go, then."

_"Yes, I suppose so. I love you."_

"I love you too, Mom."

_"Goodbye."_

"Bye."

Scully hung up the phone and wiped a stray tear off her face. She walked into the bathroom, Mulder had left the door open as an obvious invitation. She climbed into the shower, not bothering to take her clothes off. He looked at her, a bar of soap in his hand, half unwrapped. Her eyes had red rings around them.

"Scully, what happened?" He pulled her to him, dropping the bar of soap on the ground.

"Nothing, I just…I miss my mom. I miss what she and I had. I'll never get to see her face again."

"Of course you will. She can fly out and see us. In a little while, of course. Right now she's being watched. But when the chase for us dies down, when the case gets cold…"

Scully shook her head, "It already fells like it's been too long since I've seen her." She put her back on the shower wall and slinked down it, so that she was just squatting against the bleached tile. "And then I miss Melissa, too. When I think of everything I've lost in the past while…Melissa, my mom, William. You too," she looked up at him, bleary eyed, "until you got back."

Mulder knelt down next to Scully. "Of course I came back to you, Scully. You knew I would, didn't you?" He put his finger under her chin and forced her to look up at him. "Didn't you?" She nodded sadly, looked away. "I just didn't know if they'd let you."

Scully's hair was matted against her forehead, Mulder smoothed it back out of the way. "I would fight to the death to get back to you, Scully."

"Ditto."

He laughed at her uncharacteristic response and she looked at him. "Oh Mulder." She reached her hands out and he lowered himself further so she could wrap them around his neck. He stood, and she came with him, her feet dangling. He kissed her tenderly at first, then with more drove her tongue into his mouth, it tasted of peppermint. He must have brushed his teeth. She was automatically aware that she had not brushed her teeth and would probably taste of salad. Oh, to Hell with it. He loved her after she had thrown up on him, she was sure he would love her if she tasted like fresh lettuce.

He put her on her feet and tugged at the bottom of her shirt. She put her arms over her head so he could pull it off. He dropped it on the floor and let her undo her bra. He put one hand on her chest and kneaded her breast softly, while leaning in for another kiss. His free hand wrapped around the back of her neck, both her hands on his shoulders. He quickly reached his hands down and unzipped her pants, pushing them and her panties off together. She jumped up and he grabbed her ass, she wrapped her legs around his back and he walked toward the wall for better support. All the while, they never stopped kissing.

He stopped for a breath and nibbled on her neck, licking the space between that, and her clavicle. She leaned her head back to give him better access, and moaned. He kept holding her bum as he entered her, making her jump."I'd forgotten how good that felt," she shivered as she spoke. It wasn't like Scully was a Catholic goody who locked herself in a chastity belt until her wedding night, but it had been quite some time since she had had sex.

He nodded and rubbed his face on hers, stubble scratching her cheek. She bit lightly on his ear, then ran her hand through his hair, before stationing it back on his shoulder. She knew if anyone were to come in right now, they'd look like a couple teenagers, fucking the sense out of each other. But this was the first time they'd had the energy (at the same time, no less) to have sex.

When he felt her get tight, and had to come when he heard her cry his name. So, in the Mulder and Scully way of doing things together, they came together. The Mulder set Scully down and sat next to her, both of them slumped against the wall, letting the now lukewarm water splash over their limp bodies.

"I think it's bed time," Scully panted.

"I agree." He stood and picked up her clothes, hanging them over the glass shower door. Then he held out his hand for her, and she stood, thanking him silently for helping her up. She turned off the shower and they walked to the bed and snuggled into the down pillows next to each other.

"It's weird to sleep at night," she whispered to him, before yawning. Mulder followed suit, the put a hand on the side of her face.

"Do you feel better now?"

"A bit. Yeah." He could feel her smile.

Mulder woke up and stretched before noting that Scully was not next to him, where she had been when they fell asleep. In fact, he couldn't see her anywhere in the room. "Scully?"

He opened the door to the bathroom, but she wasn't there. For a moment, he was scared she had run away from him, but then he remembered that wasn't like Scully. She had never run from anything, and now with their relationship being what it was, she definitely wouldn't go anywhere. He pulled on some shorts and then rummaged through his bag for a pair of pants. Suddenly, Scully came in, dressed in a white terry robe, carrying a tray with breakfast on it.

"I thought you could use some food?"

He nodded, and smiled. Just happy she hadn't run away, or worse, been taken away. He picked up a muffin off the tray, and watched Scully stir cream into her coffee. "You were already getting dressed, Mulder?"

He glanced at his half done up pants, and grinned. "Yeah," he blushed, afraid she might discover what he had feared.

"We need to go shopping for some clothes," she paused to blow on her coffee and take a sip, "but first I need a _real _shower."

He smiled at her and nodded to the bathroom, giving her consent to leave him. She put her steaming coffee down and walked into the bathroom.

********M&S********

The man giving them their fake ID's was a little greasy. He leered at Scully and shook Mulder's hand with a wet grip. Scully's name was changed to Jane Hitchcock, and Mulder was Daniel Johnston. They had considered taking the same "last name", but that would have required a forged marriage certificate, and that would have cost more. Mulder had told Scully when they left, after a couple of hours in the stuffy "office", that he would still call her Scully. He always would. She would always call him Mulder. They went to get a coffee.

"Scully, we never really talked about any kids but William." He sipped the coffee, and stared at her over the wispy steam the escaped from the mug.

She nodded, and stirred her coffee. "But you know, Mulder. You know how much I want kids." He smiled at her as a way of acknowledging her comment.

"Did you want something to eat?" Unintentionally, he changed the subject, only trying to be sure she was cared for. She shook her head and continued to stir her coffee.

"Do you want kids?" She had never been positive how he felt about kids. William had seemed to make him so proud, but he was an accident…after all.

"I want the dream. I want the kids, and the house," Mulder put his hand on hers, rubbing it with his thumb, "and the wife."

Scully looked out the window and swiped a thumb under her eyes, drying away the tears. "Me, too. Me, too."

The waitress brought them both some waffles. While she was cutting hers, she looked up, "Won't it be weird though, we've been together without being together for so long." Her eyebrows furrowed as she contemplated her own question.

He shook his head vehemently. "Look at us. We've been living together the past week. I'd never live with anyone else for the rest of my life. After living with Phoebe, I know you're much better."

"What's that mean?"

He looked to the side and shifted, obviously uncomfortable talking about his ex-wife. "You're much nicer to me."

"What?" Scully was concerned now. When talking about someone who was definitely nowhere near caused someone this much distress, there were obvious problems.

"You're cleaner too."

"What was that first thing, you said?" She asked quietly, reaching across the table to touch him softly, letting him know she was there for him no matter what. He frowned, and pursed his lips.

"She was…she was into S and M."

Scully's jaw dropped momentarily. After the shock wore off she rubbed her chin. "And you weren't?"

"No! Never!" He was defensive now. Scully had never thought Mulder would be a man who could be forced into something. Hell, he was practically raped. But if he wouldn't say so, she couldn't.

"I didn't think so, I just wanted to make sure."

"You take care of me Scully. You make me whole. You keep me normal, and keep me sane. Phoebe's half the reason I went insane. I'd never pick another woman to live with. Never."

She nodded and stroked his hand once more before moving her hand and finishing the dicing of her waffle. He cut his piece by piece as he ate it. His waffle was dripping with syrup, hers barely glistening from it. If someone walked by, they might think them strangers for the silence they sat in, and the extreme opposites of them. But the silence was amicable, and the differences were defeated by the things that were similar.

They rented an apartment to move into two weeks later. Mulder and Scully had conflicting design interests, but in the end she won. The apartment had an extra room, because she still had hopes that it might be filled one day.

***3 Months Later***

Scully patted dry her rounding belly, before walking into the bedroom. It was small and it smelt like smoke, but she knew the accommodations were temporary. Mulder was sleeping on his side, legs spread out in what looked like an extremely uncomfortable way. Even though he worked and she did not, Scully still habitually woke earlier than her partner. She sat on the edge of their bed, next to him, and shook him, loosely holding her towel with one hand.

He breathed in quickly before blinking and staring at her. "Good morning, Scully."

She smiled down at him in response. Mulder patted her belly and gently rested his head on it, "Good morning, baby."

Scully smiled again. "Mulder, you had better get up and get a shower. You work in an hour and a half."

He shook his head, but rose none-the-less. When he had lived on his own, he got up only half an hour before work. Scully watched him lumber off to the washroom then she pulled out some clothes and began dressing. Then she made the bed (adorned in a handmade quilt sent to them as a wedding gift from Margaret Scully) and left their room. Scully turned on the coffee pot before turning her attention to some food.

Her husband humoured her during her pregnancy and ate whatever she was in the mood for, as long as _he _didn't have to make it. Scully watched the batter ooze as she pressed down on the waffle iron. While with cooked, she grabbed a knife and sliced off the burnt dribbles.

Mulder had a cold shower every morning. First to save money and second to remind himself that this was real. It was hard to believe that Scully was his wife, happily carrying his child (for the second time) and at that very moment, she was in their tiny kitchen making him breakfast. He made sure the last of his shampoo was rinsed before stepping out of the shower.

Scully had put his uniform on their bed, but was leaving him to get his socks and underwear. Mulder had taken on a career as a police officer, desperately missing the adrenaline that came with being on the field. Unlike all the other wives Scully had met at the bi-monthly barbeque, Mulder's wife never worried too much. He had been in much more dangerous situations. Though, with a baby on the way, her mind was never entirely at ease.

"Mm…Waffles," Mulder smiled as he pulled out his chair, grateful for a normal breakfast. Scully put a mug of coffee in front of him and sat down opposite his spot. The table was small enough for his socked feet to rub her swollen ones.

"My mom wants to come visit us." She glanced up nervously from her waffle.

"Mm…what!"

"Oh, Mulder. It's been five months. If anyone asks, she's visiting some friends."

"I don't know. Where would she sleep?"

"In the office. It'll be the nursery soon anyways. Please?"

"I'll think about."

Before Mulder and Scully lived together, Scully would have never let Mulder make decisions for her. But now that he was _really_ her significant other, she felt he had some say. "What's going on at work?"

"I got lucky, Scully." Mulder was ecstatic now.

"What do you mean?" she asked, popping the last chunk of waffle into her mouth.

"Well, we've got a case that could be an X-File. I'm not sure. But I got on it!" He downed his coffee and glanced at Scully, who was frowning. "What?"

"Just be careful, Mulder. Ok?"

He nodded and stood. "I should get going." He buttoned the top snap on his shirt and glanced at her. She had a faint glow about her and had both hands on her stomach. She was smiling lightly. "I'll see you tonight." He leaned over and pecked her on the cheek before leaving. Scully got to the studious task of cleaning the dishes off the table.

_Scully sat on the bed next to him, her chest heaving with her deep anticipatory breaths. Mulder ran a hand over her thigh, he was probably looking forward to this more than she was. His thumb played with the lace on the edge of her panties, he stared at the yellow matching bra. It really clashed pitifully with her skin tone, but she looked gorgeous none-the-less. Her milky skin glistened with sweat in the filtered moonlight. Mulder was laying on the motel bed, in boxers, knowing this moment could never have been planned. The room was hot and the AC broken. Both of them had ended up stripping down to escape the heat, and Mulder had been having a nightmare when Scully came in to save him, forgetting how exposed she was._

_She ran a hand over his burning temple and he felt his lower abdomen twist at her loving touch. He moved his hips a little, sub-consciously trying to get his groin closer to hers. He bit his lower lip and burrowed into her eyes. She had come in and he was quietly moaning, grasping at the sheets. He whispered for them not to take her, but him instead. Scully wasn't sure what the nightmare had been about, she never asked. But she thought she knew. Mulder had always had guilt over his sister being taken and not him, instead. She gently shook him, and his eyes fluttered open. It took him to moment to focus on her._

_That was when he realized she was in her underwear, and so was he. "You ok?" she asked, almost silent. He nodded. She was about to rise when he touched the back of her thigh, "Don't." So she didn't. She sat back down. Her flat stomach moved back and forth, she was slightly nervous. He ran his hand over her back until it got to the elastic of her underwear. He ran is index finger along it, sending a shiver down her spine and groan up her throat. He slowly sat up and kissed her chastely. When he leaned back she licked her lips as though to gather all of him that she could. He kissed her again, driving his tongue gently into her mouth, she let him in, their tongues wrapping around each other, twisting in each other's mouths. _

_He wrapped his arms around her waist, the room still hot, skin sliding against skin. She scooted onto his lap and could feel his excitement against her skin. He rubbed her side, feeling her ribs and strong abdominal muscles. Then he slid his hand along smooth skin to the back of her bra and un-clipped it. It fell off when she pushed her arms forward and he nudged it. He stared, indulgingly, for a moment at the perfect mounds of her breasts before lowering his torso so he could nuzzle her neck. His naked chest against her naked chest. He didn't think the night could be any better until she reached down and grabbed him._

_Mulder sucked in a deep breath and looked at her. She was smiling and her eyes were too. That, he could never mistrust. He pulled her into a tighter hug and then she pushed him away. He was shocked momentarily before she hooked her thumbs into his boxers and pulled them down. He grinned and ran his palms over her face, fingers detailing her eyes. Eventually he lost all sanity, after she had grasped his member and started sliding her hand up and down. He had to be in her. Now. _

_He pulled off her lingerie and laid back. She clambered clumsily on top of him, slipping on his slick body. She lowered herself on top of him and whimpered contentedly after doing so. He lightly grabbed her hips and they started to rock together. She rose off him slowly, putting him through pure, wonderful agony. Then she fell back down. She did this until he thought he would explode. He begged her to go faster. He pleaded with her. She nodded, and he knew she needed release too._

_They sped up, crying together for what should have been long ago, and what finally was. He moaned her name, and she moaned his. During their climaxes which came one after another, Mulder came to the realization that he had never had sex this good. Not only was Scully amazing, but she was the one woman he knew he could spend the rest of his life with without wanting to die. She screamed his name and fell over next to him. He gently pulled out of her and stretched out. He was extremely hot now._

_She asked him if he thought they had woken their neighbours. He chuckled and nodded before rising and heading for the shower. He looked at her questioningly and she too rose, joining him for the ritual cleansing that always comes after a dirty deed. They never spoke of it, but both of them always knew it was there, just lurking under the surface. It would happen again one day, and when it did, nobody would be ready._

Mulder came in, his arm swinging loosely, barely held in place by the black sling a doctor had given him. Scully was sleeping quietly on the couch and he tried not to wake her, but it was difficult to move with only one arm. His pistol dropped to the ground with a clatter and she bolted up. "Mulder? Where have you been?"

There was no accusation of cheating in her voice, just a fearful curiosity. "We found a suspect, who was tied to an X-File, Scully! He was Robert Modell's son! He convinced one of my partners to dislocate my shoulder before I finally shot him. That's the only way to stop those guys, you know? They can convince anyone of anything. Anyways, it took a while for that idiot doctor to set my arm. I kept telling them they should call you, but they said there was no point, I'd be out of there in half an hour. I wasn't." He sat on the couch next to her, and she started pulling his jacket off for him, being gentle when she came to his shoulder.

"When do they want you back on the field?"

"The boss made me take a week's leave. Then he said I'll come back in and he'll decide. He sounds like Skinner, huh?" he hissed a little as the blue garment slipped over his sore spot.

"Yeah, just a little." She agreed, and dropped the jacket on the floor. "Mulder, you've got to be careful, got it?"

"Scully, come on. I mean, I lived through nine _years _of us working on cases like this."

"Yeah, but you knew more, you had access to more information. And you had me. I try not to worry too much, but I can't lose you. Not again."

He nodded at her before rising. "Come with me. We both need some sleep."

He climbed under the quilt and rolled over on his good shoulder. She wrapped an arm around him, their unborn baby wedged between them. Their fingers interlaced and she sighed. "Could this get any better?"

He nodded into her hair. "Soon, in six months, moments like this will be interrupted by the cry of a baby."

She cocked her head confused, but then laughed at him. "You speak in tongues sometimes, Mulder." He pushed his face into her chest, his breathing slowed and she knew he was drifting off to sleep. She too closed her eyes and relaxed in his grasp. She knew that the baby and her were safe in his arms, but her eyes popped open for a moment, wondering who was watching out for him.

Mulder woke to Scully bent over the toilet, moaning as if someone had just beat her. He sat up so he could see more of her. She was in her usual night attire, a silky set of pajamas. Whenever he went anywhere…business trips, mostly, he would arrive home to her in one of his old t-shirts, asleep. If she was awake, she normally had one of his shirts on anyways. It was a luxury she told him she had always wanted – to be able to wear his shirts without worrying about anyone seeing.

She had told him that after he was abducted, she went back to his apartment to feed his fish and just collapsed on his bed sobbing. After she had cried for about an hour, she stripped out of her work clothes and tugged on one of his work-out t-shirts. She was mildly scared that Skinner might pop in, but she ignored it. She went around his apartment, making herself something to eat (though there was barely anything in the fridge) and sitting on his couch to watch some TV. Then she started to cry again, because she knew that he should have been there.

He liked to come home and find her in his clothes. It made him feel even better about himself. Scully never made him feel as though she didn't want him, but it was always nice to feel wanted just a little more. He got out of bed, and walked over to the washroom. She glanced at him from the toilet and wiped her mouth off, sadly smiling. He returned the gesture before wetting a face cloth and squatting next to her. She grinned and sighed contentedly as he wiped off her sweating face.

"Can you believe I ever looked forward to this?"

"You look forward to a lot of weird things, Scully…like, finding out what the Fiji Mermaid was."

"If I recall," she retorted, quietly, "It was you, Mr. Mulder, who wanted to find the alluring mermaid."

He shook his head. "So, what are we doing today?"

Her eyes widened, "I forgot you were on leave today. You should get some more sleep and I'll go pick up your pain killers."

"I'm not going to get anymore sleep."

She nodded. Once Mulder woke up there was no getting him back to sleep unless you had anaesthetics. "Well, I need a shower and you do, too." She ran her hand through his hair, catching it on some dirt, or blood. She wasn't sure which.

He frowned as she flicked it off her nail, "Sorry."

"It's ok." She started to shimmy out of her pyjamas and Mulder pulled out his toothbrush. They still took showers together, but they got excited and today, Mulder just couldn't be doing that. So there was a silent agreement that the showers would be single. He went into the linen closet and pulled out a towel for her, and one for himself before walking into the kitchen to get something to eat.

She came to get him about half an hour later and let him know the shower was his, but he should stay and chat with her for a while if he wanted any hot water. "Why do you take so long?"

She put her leg on his and he ran his fingers up to her thigh, where her pink towel stopped. They were smooth. "I shaved my legs. It takes a while." He nodded and put his hand on the inside of her thigh. He dropped his spoon into his bowl and milk splashed everywhere, Cheerios with it. Her mouth opened a little. "Mulder…the kitchen?"

He smiled at her. He pushed his hand up a little further and she breathed in.

********M&S********

They picked up Mulder's painkillers then did a little grocery shopping. They bickered the entire time over what food they should be eating, but Scully always ended up winning, giving in once to buy Mulder a couple packages of sunflower seeds. When they got to the counter a teenage boy was ringing their items through. Mulder had his arms wrapped around Scully when he spoke, "It just doesn't make sense to me," he said to the young man, "I make the money, but I'm not allowed to spend it how I want." Scully playfully slapped his arm.

After the grocery shopping, she took him to a gated community. It was townhouses, but it was a brand new development. She told him she had seen it one day and fallen in love with it. "If we were to get one, it wouldn't be much more then we're paying now. Please? I want to raise my baby somewhere beautiful. Not in an old crack house."

"Scully! We don't live in a crack house." He jested, then bit his lip. "Have you gone inside?"

She blushed and nodded. "It's great, Mulder! Two bathrooms, three bedrooms, a kitchen, a living room, and a basement. I'd get a garden and there would be a back yard for our baby."

"Then I guess we're buying it."

She stared at him a moment. He glanced at her and put a finger under her chin to close her mouth.

"Scully, I've always trusted your judgment. If you say it's great, then it must be great."

"Then we're moving?"

"We're moving."

********M&S********

They moved in a week after buying the place, Margaret Scully flew up to help. She said she didn't encounter anyone at the airport, but Mulder picked her up, himself, just in case. The nursery was yellow; they decided they didn't want to know the sex of the baby. Margaret told Scully, over a cup of tea one night while Mulder was at work, that Bill had another child, whom he named Sissie. She also said she had known since the day she met Fox, the he and Scully were meant to be, but she had to let them find out in their own time.

Scully nodded and stirred her cooling tea quietly, "Mom?" Her mother nodded. "What do you think of Mulder?" Margaret stared at the ring on her daughter's finger for a moment before replying. "I loved Fox as soon as I met him because I could tell how good he was for you. No matter how much trouble he gets you in, I could never dislike him because he makes you so happy.'

Scully nodded and tapped her hand on her mug, the ring that Mulder had given her clinking against it. She glanced at the clock and, seeing this, her mother put a hand on hers.

"I remember when I used to watch the clock, waiting for you father to return home. There was always the fear that the time would pass and he wouldn't be there. It's ironic that he died with me."

Scully shook thoughts of Mulder dying out of her head. "I've got to fold some laundry, I'll go grab it and be right back." Her mother grinned and watched her rise before picking up the empty tea cups and placing them in the dishwasher. As Scully was climbing back up the stairs, hidden behind a basket of whites, Mulder came in. He smiled at Margaret, locked the door, then walked to Scully. He took the basket from her hands and kissed her quickly. In response, she smiled while he put the laundry on their couch.

"There's dinner in the oven," she told him. He kissed her again, then ran up the stairs to change.

"No wonder he makes you so happy…" Margaret smiled at Scully before sitting to help her fold the laundry. Mulder jumped the stairs, in jeans and a grey t-shirt and pulled his dinner out of the oven. He sniffed it and breathed out in a long sigh.

"How was work?" Margaret asked, quietly.

"Alright," he replied, pulling a fork out of drawer. He sidled over and sat next to Scully's mom. "Anything happen while I was gone?" and they shook their heads.

"You have the day off tomorrow?" Scully inquired. Mulder nodded. "Do you want to go see a play?" Margaret turned to her daughter. "What plays are out?"

"Victoria School is running the Crucible. It's supposed to be a great production, and since it's easily construed as a statement about political conspiracies, I thought you might enjoy."

Mulder assented through a mouth full of Sheppard's pie. Margaret nodded, "Sounds good."

"Oh!" Scully dropped the towel she was holding and put her hand on her belly. Mulder remembered when he had brought Scully a gift during her pregnancy with William, and he panicked. He stood quickly, his plate clattering to the floor. Scully saw the fear in his eyes. " Mulder, it's alright. The baby just kicked. That's all." Margaret, shocked by Mulder's violent reactions, had pushed her body back into the couch. Once he had calmed, he blushed and bent to pick up the spilled food. His mother-in-law shooed him away.

"It's alright, Fox, I'll get it." He tried to help for a moment, but finally gave when he realized that the effort was fruitless and let her sweep up the beef and shards of plate. He walked over and sat next to Scully and put a hand on her belly. He jumped after the baby kicked. "Whatever you are," he spoke to his wife's belly, "You'll be a soccer player."

"Or a ballerina." Scully reprimanded him. Margaret laughed at them as she went to the kitchen to get a broom and dustpan. Dana yawned, "Well, I'm off to bed. I'm _so _tired."

Mulder rose as she stood and glanced at Margaret, "You two have a good night," she said, giving him unspoken consent to go with Dana and tuck her in, perhaps join her.

"Goodnight, Mom," Scully said, already scaling the stairs.

"'Night, Mrs. Scully."

Margaret sighed, making her disdain about how Mulder addressed her obvious.

********M&S********

A red-haired father-to-be shot his head up after he heard a scream. Was that his wife? He glanced at the seat across the waiting room, where a jacket was. A man had rushed in and sat there only moments ago, along with a steaming cup of coffee, and then he hurried out of the room.

Nurse Higgins, just a beginning nurse, walked by and stared intently at the man for a moment. A pity his wife's religion wouldn't allow him in the birthing room, but she realized that was what gave the world flavour. She brought _him _a cup of coffee and told him to watch out, it was hot. Then she headed off to get the ice chips she had been asked to retrieve. The plastic cup in front of her, she walked to room 112, where the head nurse of the shift was consoling a woman only beginning to know what labour pains were.

Anna, the head nurse, took the green cup from her assistant and smiled as a speedy way of thanks. She glimpsed into the cup and frowned at how few ice chips there were. After handing them to the expectant father, she pulled Higgins to the side and told her, "Next time, bring more."

Mulder gratefully took the ice and sat down next to his wife. She was sweating an awful lot and every time she looked at her large belly or shifted her swollen feet, she grimaced. But, unlike all the deliveries Mulder had seen on TV, she never once blamed him. She never told him that "You're never coming near me with that thing again!" She just let him pamper her.

He ran a cool cloth over her forehead, wiping away the sweat. Her mom sat in a chair, at the edge of the room, not quite sure what to do, now, since Dana had a husband. There was no frightening, lonesome (albeit, crowded) birth on a farm. Mulder was there to save her the whole time. He squeezed her hand gently. "The doctor told us it would be any time now. You'll be just fine."

She nodded at him and sucked on the ice he popped into her mouth. She licked her lips, and his finger in the process. He smiled provocatively at her, but she just frowned. He was scared the lecture was coming, but there was nothing. Scully, was, as usual, quiet.

She closed her eyes for a moment and thought back to the day she found out she was pregnant. She knew she would have this day, the most painful and happy day of her life, and her heart was pounding.

_Mulder came home from work, exhausted, as usual. He sat on the couch and started to take off his shoes. He glanced around himself a couple times, the called out her name, "Scully!" She came running down the stairs, wearing one of his t-shirts. She had been lying in bed, waiting for him, like a child waits for Santa Claus._

_"Mulder!" She threw her arms around him from behind the couch and kissed the top of his head, "Guess what?_

_He shook his head, surprised at her demeanour, this was most unlike the woman he was married. Though, he did know her to act quite young when she was excited. "What?"_

_She danced around to the front of the couch and sat in front of him, "I'm pregnant! We're pregnant! We're having a baby!"_

_He smiled and pulled his wife into a bear hug. "Scully, that's amazing...but, how?" _

"_I don't know," her smile faltered a little, but came back anew. "I don't know how it happened, Mulder, but it did. I'm having your baby. I would say it's too good to be true, but I just took a third pregnancy test." _

"_This is incredible! We have to celebrate." He kissed her full on the mouth, before rising and grabbing two champagne glasses from the cupboard. He un-capped some juice, filled the glasses, and handed hers to her. She sat next to him, her head on his shoulder sipping at it. This was their sad, but perfect version of celebrating. Every now and then she would look sheepishly at him and smile._

That flashback had saved her from dealing with another painful contraction, but the second one pulled her from it like a rubber band snapping back. Her nurse told her they would get the doctor. She was ready. Her eyes widened, but her husband grabbed her hand. "It's ok. You've done this before. You'll be fine."

A male doctor in green scrubs came in, his hands held in front of him and gloved in blue. He sat on a stool that Nurse Higgins pushed under him and smiled at Scully as he scooted towards where her legs were, spread wide open. He lifted up the blue cloth concealing her and smiled. "Yes, Mrs. Mulder, you're all ready to have this baby!"

She pushed when they told her and breathed when she could. Mulder's hand was cramped after 10 minutes because she was squeezing it so hard. He smiled at her, though, as he massaged it. "One last push," the nurses encouraged a panting Scully. She gritted her teeth and screamed out. Finally, her daughter was born.


	2. Finding Answers That You Don't Want, Too

For disclaimer, etc., see chapter 1!!

* * *

Mulder had never seen his wife look more beautiful. The last time he had seen her in the after math of a birth, she looked frightened, terrified, even, and her body exuded the energy of anguish. But this time, she was glowing. A small girl was cradled in her arms, cooing with her eyes closed and a tight fist curled around her mother's extended index finger. If, at this very moment, he had been required to put a title on the image in front of him, Mulder would have called it perfect.

"What are you going to name her?" The nurse who was cleaning up the medical equipment asked, smiling at the happy family.

Scully looked up at Mulder, and they shared a quick smile. Choosing their daughter's name had been somewhat of a predicament for Mulder and Scully. They wanted their daughter to have the last name "Mulder", but at the moment, their names were Jane and Daniel Johnston. Any names close to Samantha or Melissa were likely to draw attention. In the end, they decided to pick a name they liked, and they would change the girl's last name when they left Canada. Unable to decide upon a name, they had asked Scully's mother for assistance. She quickly came up with a name, different, and suiting to the child of such a pair.

"Evelynne Smith," Mulder told the nurse while Scully looked back at the baby, smoothing a small tuft of hair down.

"That's an interesting name," responded the nurse as she started to leave the room.

"I helped pick it," Maggie said from the chair next to Scully's bed. "I think it's beautiful."

"Me too," Scully said, still grinning at her child.

********M&S********

Maggie had gone home to get some rest, Mulder was reclining on the bed with Scully, their bodies pressed closely together so that neither one would be in danger of falling off. Evelynne lay sleeping between the two of them. "You should get going, you'll be late for work," Scully told Mulder, pressing her forehead to his hand as he brushed her hair back.

"I know. But I don't want to leave."

"You can come back tonight."

"I know." He pressed his mouth to her forehead, letting his lips linger for a moment as he placed a kiss there. "But you both look so beautiful. I just don't want to leave."

"Don't worry," she assured him, "We'll be here when you get back."

Mulder nodded, and pushed himself over the bed, bending over to plant a last kiss on each of the girl's faces. He grabbed his uniform shirt off the back of a chair (Scully had made him take it off so it wouldn't wrinkle too much) and pulled it on. "You ladies behave while I'm gone."

She grinned and let her eyes fall shut, listened as he quietly pulled the door shut.

A half hour later a nurse came in to take Evelynne and put her in her bassinet so that Scully would be able to rest easier. She found the loss of heat that her daughter shared with her to be disconcerting, and instead of sleeping, rolled over on her side to watch the infant sleep, her tiny chest rising and falling with each breath. It was hard to hold back the tears welling up in her eyes – Scully yearned more now than ever for her first born. How perfect would it have been, her toddler, standing on his tippy toes, trying to see his sister's face?

Scully tried often to avoid thinking about how things could have been if they weren't so hard. Her and Mulder could live at home, Maggie could come over for dinner every Sunday, children would run around their house, screaming and laughing. Mulder could still see his strange friends, the Lone Gunmen, because in Scully's perfect world, they never died. They never had to. Doggett and Reyes were still a part of their lives, as was Skinner. They wrote a yearly Christmas card, and signed it "Fox and Dana Mulder". They went grocery shopping and didn't glance around every corner for a sign of danger.

But thinking about her perfect world only hurt, because Scully knew it was never attainable. She would never see her son again, and her stomach burned with guilt whenever she thought about him. Evelynne marked a new start for them, a new chance for a happiness. But things could never be what she imagined.

Scully finally closed her eyes and succumbed to sleep, listening to low, keening whistle of her daughter's snores.

********M&S*******

"Ready to go home?" Mulder asked, leaning against the wall, watching _his_ wife do up the final snap on _his _daughter's onsie.

"Just about," Scully told him, smiling down at Evelynne, running the tip of her finger over the soft skin on her pudgy cheek. "Just want to put some clothes on, if that's okay." She was still in her pyjamas and a robe. Mulder nodded, walked over to pick up the girl, and cradled her in his arms. He watched Scully intently as she dressed, folding her pyjamas, tugging her shirt over her head, her pert nipples tenting the soft cotton.

"No bra?" He asked quietly. His voice had suddenly taken on a mildly husky tone.

"No," she laughed, turning to look at him. "My breasts are so sensitive lately, and I thought since we're just going home..."

"Mhm." He rocked Evelynne a little, to remind himself his daughter was in the room. Scully pulled on a pair of pants and zipped her overnight bag closed. Mulder handed the dozing baby to her and picked up the bag. "Ready now?" he asked her, leading the way out the door.

"Yes, am I ever."

"Your mom's waiting at the house." He held the wheelchair steady while Scully sat in it.

"I don't need a wheelchair Mulder," she protested, but let him push her to the elevator, none the less.

"Scully, I wasn't even _there_ when my last kid was born. I'm pulling out all the stops this time, okay?"

She giggled while he pushed them through the open doors, and while the elevator descended, she craned her head back. He bent over and kissed her. "I love you," she whispered in his ear.

"Me too," he told her, pushing her out to the car. He opened the back door so Scully could put Evelynne in her car seat. She buckled her daughter in and then shut the door quietly, trying not to wake the still slumbering baby.

"I know she's safer in the back seat," she told him as he stuck his keys into the ignition, "but I hate letting her out of my sight."

"I know." He put a hand on Scully's once he had pulled out of the parking space, and drove his family home.

********M&S********

Maggie had gone home a week after the baby was born, she couldn't be gone too long or it would stir up suspicion. It was four o' clock in the morning, the day after they had dropped her off at the airport, and Scully was currently rocking a screaming baby, trying to coax her to nurse. Mulder was in bed, a pillow over his ears, not doing anything to drown out the noise.

"Shh, shh, shh, baby, it's okay." Scully rocked back and forth in the pink chair which had been a gift from Skinner, who had somehow found out about the baby, and had had the chair delivered. (Scully had it in her mind that there might be something between her mother and the man, but she wasn't sure enough to ask.) Finally Evelynne latched onto the proffered nipple and began to nurse, closing her eyes as she did so. Scully felt the baby's body relax, and decided it was safe to stand and go to the bedroom, stretch her legs. Mulder was sprawled on the bed, he legs atop the sheets, trying to cool down.

The AC had broken the night before, and even with all of the windows open, the fan on, and a shedding of all clothing, Mulder was down right burning to death. Scully sat down next to him, reclining against the headboard, still cradling her baby with one arm, and reached out to push some of the sweat soaked hair off his face.

"I'm dying," he told her matter-of-factly.

"I know. We are too." She gestured to the baby in her arms, clad only in a diaper and sweating (as profusely as a baby can) and then to herself – no shirt, and a skimpy pair of panties. "Evelynne's not going to be able to sleep like this. I think I'm going to run a cool bath for us."

Mulder rolled over on his stomach, trying to let his damp back dry off. "Scully, if we're all dying of heat here, how can we move to South America?"

"Maybe we shouldn't go there." She continued to talk to him as she walked to the bathroom adjacent to their room. "Maybe we should look at moving to somewhere in Europe. Or, oh! Mulder, what about Ireland?"

"It rains all the time, there."

"It would be cooler."

He gave a non-committal grunt as a response and closed his eyes, continuing to fight nobly in his battle for sleep. The water gushed into the tub, and Scully sat on the edge, continuing to nurse Evelynne as she tested the water's temperature. She was tempted to make it as cold as she could, but knew that it should be at least lukewarm if she was going to bring Evelynne in with her. Soon the baby finished nursing and unlatched. Scully took her into the bedroom, lay her on the bed next to her dozing father, who reached out an arm, fumbled around blindly, and finally placed his hand on the baby's abdomen. Unwilling to take this moment of bonding away from them, Scully stripped out of her underwear, grabbed a book, and climbed into the bath on her own.

She hadn't been in the tub long, maybe she'd read five pages, when a snort caught her attention. The bed clothes were rustling in the room next to her. Tempted as she was to and check on the two of them, she was sure they were fine and so she stayed in the tub a little longer. But Scully's mind wasn't focussing on the words she was reading over and over again – she kept thinking about Mulder and Evelynne – what had that snort meant? Just when she was about to give up her internal argument and go check on them, a mussed Mulder appeared in the doorway – sans Evelynne.

"Where is she?" Scully asked, setting her book on the closed toilet seat.

"Sleeping. I put a few pillows around her. She's in the middle of the bed – just like it's all supposed to be." He came further into the bathroom, dipped a hand into the water and then placed it on her abdomen, trailed his fingers over her breast and stopped on her cheek. "Can I join you?"

"I'm trying to _cool off _here, Mulder."

He laughed quietly, but climbed in anyways, not waiting for a real answer. His long legs wrapped around her body, he settled in behind her, letting her dampened hair cling to his chest. Scully ran her hands over his legs and then turned so that she could lean her head back and get a better look at him.  
"Can't sleep, huh?"

"No," he sighed, moving the water with his hands. "It hasn't been coming easily lately."

"I've noticed," she told him, relaxing her neck, and choosing to stare at the wall for a while instead of him. She pressed a hand to his forearm, stilling his constant motion. "Is there something wrong at work? Is there something going on I should know about?"

"No." But she could feel him tense behind her. She knew when he was keeping something from her.

"Are you not allowed to talk about it?" she asked him quietly. In the past they had always been able to share the details of cases together – they had worked on them together. It was hard for both of them to deal with this necessary secrecy.

"I'm not supposed to."

"It's upsetting you." She rolled over, manoeuvred her body so that she was stomach to stomach with him, his hands were resting on the small of her back. "Can't you just tell me why it's upsetting you?"

He sighed. "Uh...sometimes I just feel like, if I could know more, if I still had access to information like I used to, maybe I could be getting somewhere. I could be preparing us for what's to come. But as it is, I'm cutting out God damn newspaper clippings and stuffing them into a drawer. I'm pulling at straws on everything, and coming up with nothing. How can I protect you? How can I protect Evelynne, if I don't really know what's out there?"

Scully's hands roamed over his chest, and she laid her cheek on his shoulder. "Mulder, when we were on the X-Files, there was still a lot of cases where we had no clue what was going on. We didn't know what was out there, but we were still fighting. We knew that eventually, we'd find the truth and it would all be worth it. We did find the truth, we know what's going to happen. It's only a matter of time – all we can do it wait. What more do you want to know?"

"What if they're following us, bugging us? What if they know we had another baby, what if they try to take her, too? When we were on the X-Files, at least I had a chance of finding that information. Now I'm just...we're just sitting ducks, waiting for the bullet to hit."

"We always were, Mulder."

He heaved another sigh, but didn't reply. He agreed with her, but voicing his assent to opinion would have made it all too real.

********M&S********

They noticed something was up when Evelynne was about 2 months old. Scully had taken her in for a check up with the family's doctor. "She's been having trouble making eye contact," she said, bouncing the giggling baby on her lap, "and she doesn't look at anything I try to show her. Right past toys. Isn't this the age when they're supposed to start really exploring their surroundings? Do you think something could be wrong with her...progressively? Mentally?"

Dr. Grey shook her head. "I think she's very healthy, Mrs. Johnston. But I think we should keep an eye on this. When you bring her in for her check up next month, I'd like to know if there's been any change in her behaviour."

"Okay." Evelynne tugged on Scully's cross and popped it in her mouth awkwardly. "Thank you Dr. Grey." Scully forced the metal out of her daughter's mouth, placed the baby in her carrier, and shook her doctor's hand.

She had walked to the clinic, even though it was a little chilly outside. Autumn in the north seemed to bring with it an abrupt weather change – how she longed for the boiling hot days of July. A blanket was tucked over Evelynne's body, leaving on her pink little face sticking out. Scully bundled herself up, too, and picked up her daughter, carrying her out into the wind. Dr. Grey's orders, rather than waylaying Scully's fears, had only served to increase them. She found, in the medical field, the only time you told someone to "wait and see" was when you had a terrible diagnosis, and you wanted to give God a little time to work a miracle.

Mulder was working the change over shift, and came home around noon, exhausted, but exciting to see his girls. Evelynne was napping, so he wrapped his arms around Scully, kissed her on the cheek. "How was your day?" Scully asked him, pulling a chicken pot pie out of the oven.

"Boring," he said, unbuttoning his shirt and walking into their bedroom. She could hear him through the walls. "Nothing exciting. What about your day?"

"Well, I took Evie to the doctor."

"And?" he asked her, coming back into the kitchen in an undershirt and sweats.

Scully turned around and leaned against the counter, wiping her hands on her jeans. "I don't know, Mulder, I'm worried."

"About what?" he asked, opening the fridge and getting out a beer. He grabbed her one too, and offered it, but she shook her head, pointing to her chest. _Still nursing, dummy._ He mentally slapped himself.

"Well, I've noticed that even though Evie is at an age where she should be exploring the world around her and taking it all in, she's not making eye contact – she's not looking at her toys, she never _looks _at you or me. She'll turn her head in our direction if she hears our voices, but she never actually looks at us. Sometimes, when I'm feeding her, I notice her struggling to find a nipple. I'm worried she might be...handicapped. I brought it up with Dr. Grey, and she just said to wait and see."

Mulder was now sitting at the kitchen table, he took a swig of his beer and leaned on one hand. "Well, if she said to wait, I guess that's all we can do..."

"But Mulder," Scully protested, feeling tears of frustration welling up in her eyes, "I _know _something's wrong, I just know it. I don't want to wait, I want to know now."

"Well, what can we do to find out?" he asked her earnestly.

"I don't know," she said, sitting down across the table from him, placing her head in her hands. "Get a second opinion, I guess."

"Well, we'll start there. We'll find another doctor-"

"I don't want to hurt Dr. Grey's feelings!" Rebecca Grey was one of the few women Scully considered a friend – her world was very small, as she didn't work and spent most of her time at home with Evelynne.

"We don't have to tell her. She'll only find out if she was wrong. In which case, I'm sure her feelings won't be hurt, she'll just want to be there for us and Evie." Mulder reached across the table and took Scully's hand. "Hey, it's gonna be okay, we'll figure this out. We've been through worse."

Scully smiled at him and nodded. "You're right." She swiped hastily at her eyes. "Would you like some lunch?" she asked him, rising a walking to the cupboard.

"I'd love some," he leaned back in his chair and watch her small body reach, standing on tip toe, grasping for a plate. She finally placed her fingers around two plates and turned back to him, grinning. "I'm starving."

********M&S********

"Rebecca? Hi, it's Daniel Johnston. Yeah, Jane's husband. Well," Mulder turned over the quarter he was holding. It had landed on heads, so he had called Dr. Grey without saying anything to Scully. "Look, Jane doesn't know I'm calling you. She's very upset over this whole thing with Evelynne. She wants a second opinion, but didn't want to say anything to you because she didn't want to hurt your feelings. But we're still pretty new to the area, I was wondering if you could recommend anyone?"

Mulder stared at the coffee table and dropped his quarter. It made a loud clanging sound as it hit the glass inlay. "What do you mean, blind?"

"Mulder, what's going on?" Scully had come in through the back door with a bag full of books - done at the mall already. He wasn't sure how much she'd heard. He shook his head at her before trying to focus on the woman talking to him on the other end of the phone, but his hearing had suddenly gone odd, there was a buzzing in the air and it was hard for him to differentiate one noise from another.

"I'm sorry, what did you say? An ophthalmologist? I...okay, what's his name? Hold on." He waved at Scully. _Pen_, he mouthed at her. She came back with a pad of paper and a pen, handing them to him, scrutinizing him. "Dr. William Fabrie? Okay, do you have a phone number? Thanks. Thank you. Okay, yeah. I'll do that. Thanks again." Mulder hung up the phone before looking guiltily at Scully. She crossed her arms and looked at him angrily.

"Look," he started, but she cut him off.

"Were you talking to Dr. Grey?" she asked him.

"I didn't know who else to go to. I just wanted answers. I know you just want to know if Evie's okay. I told her we just wanted to be safe." Scully turned to walk away from him, striding quickly toward Evelynne's room, even as he continued to talk. He followed her, still trying to explain himself. "She wasn't upset, Scully. She said it's natural to be worried. She said she could only think that it might be a vision problem. She gave me a number, Scully. She said this guy isn't really accepting patients, but if I say who sent us, we've got a good chance of getting in."

Scully lifted Evelynne out of her crib. The baby had been awake, but hadn't cried – it was as though she knew someone would be there to get her soon. Mulder had noticed his daughter was quite often extremely stoic, patient as a sphinx. Scully laid the baby down on a mat, and kneeling beside her, motioned for Mulder to join them on the floor. He squatted down next to them. "Look at this," she said, grabbing a brightly coloured stuffed elephant from the rocking chair. She moved it back and forth across Evelynne's field of vision, with no reaction from the infant. "Mulder, I think Dr. Grey is right. There is something wrong with her vision. I'm mad at you for going behind my back, but I'm glad you got that number. I'm so worried."

********M&S********

Mulder had the day off work and came to Dr. Fabrie's with Scully and Evelynne. There was a sickening knot of worry building in his stomach, and he was sure Scully had one that was at least two times as bad. Evelynne was reclining against his chest, holding one of his fingers hostage in her very wet mouth. He tried to focus on talking to her, making her giggle as they sat in the full waiting room, but Scully's fidgeting next to him, her constant glances at the door, made him feel just as nervous as she was.

After what seemed like ages, an young woman came out from behind the door and called his daughter's name. The trio shuffled into the back of the office, where a number of eye related machines sat on tables. "Mr. and Mrs. Johnston?" The assistant smiled at them as they nodded at her. "And this must be Evelynne," she bent and smiled at the baby, but a small frown flickered over her face when the child looked past her blankly. She quickly plastered the smile back on her face. "You have a beautiful baby. Dr. Fabrie will be with you shortly." She placed a folder on the table and left the office, closing the door until it was only open a crack.

Scully reached over to pick up the file and flipped through it. "Nothing new," she told Mulder, who had been watching her for any reactions. "It's just the file Dr. Grey must have sent over." Mulder nodded and shifted positions. "Do you want me to hold her?" Scully asked, reaching out her arms for the baby. It wasn't really a question. Just as Mulder was passing Evelynne over, the door opened. An elderly man came in, frowning.

"You must ze Johnstons." He had a thick German accent, and seemed to exude apathy with every step. "I heard about 'choo from my good friend, Dr. Grey." He picked up the file and flipped through it. "It seems to me that 'chour daughter is possibly suffering from infantile blindness."

"In...infantile blindness?" Scully choked out, unconsciously pressing Evelynne closer to her chest. "As in, it doesn't last beyond infancy?"

"No. As in it begins in infancy." He told her bluntly. "Of course," he seemed to realize he had been harsh. "I haf only gone over her records. I will require a thorough examination to give a definitive diagnosis."

Scully nodded dumbly and handed over her daughter to the assistant who had appeared, watched as the baby was put through a short battery of tests. By the end, Evelynne was wailing, dripping snot onto her father's shirt as he held her, trying to comfort her. Dr. Fabrie had left them in the room. He said he needed a few moments to go over the test results. He would be with them soon. Mulder was rubbing Evelynne's back, her sobs had reduced to sniffles as she tired herself out. Scully was leaning on his shoulder, trying not to think about what they would hear when the man came back.

It took Dr. Fabrie a while, but eventually he did come back into the room. "Well," he said, taking a seat and flipping open the now marginally thicker folder, "it seems that my assumption was correct. Based on multiple test results, I do believe your daughter is blind."


	3. A Power You Never Knew You Had

Title: A Power You Never Knew You Had  
Rating: R  
Disclaimer: X-files belong not to me, but to the all powerful C-man. Please don't sue!  
Summary: Mulder and Scully are on the run, trying to evade the government after "The Truth". New adventures await them, but maybe more than X-Files are in store?  
Spoilers: Any and all X-Files episodes, FTF, IWTB

* * *

"Blind?" Scully asked, sitting up straighter. "No, that can't be...no...that's...I..." Words failed her as she attempted to communicate. Her mouth was opening and closing, but very little sound was coming out.

"This is the worst diagnosis for me to deliver." The doctor sighed and leaned on his knees. "As far as I can tell, all that Evelynne can see is large shapes – they appear as shadows to her. Of course, this is speculation. Her vision may be better, or worse. We'll have to wait until she's older and can communicate better with us." He was visibly weighed down by the bad news.

Scully looked desperately from the doctor to her now sleeping daughter. _Blind? _"But, Mul-" She stopped herself suddenly, catching the mistake as it tumbled out of her mouth. "Daniel, this can't be happening. How?"

He shook his head, never gave her a verbal response. Scully reached out her arms, begging to hold her child and Mulder wordlessly placed the infant on her chest. He turned to the doctor. "Thank you very much for your time." The words were difficult to get out, they hardly passed over the large lump in his throat. Mulder grasped Scully's elbow and helped her to stand, grabbed the baby carrier off the floor. Dr. Fabrie stood and opened the door.

"My assistant will contact you some time in the near future with any outstanding bills, and to set up another appointment."

Mulder nodded again, _What else can you say? _and continued to lead Scully out of the building. Numbly, she let him take the baby from her arms and place her in the car seat. Mulder opened Scully's door for her, gently pushed her into the car and went around to the other side. Scully did not speak the entire ride home, and he knew better than to attempt to start a conversation. When they arrived home, he took Evelynne inside, placed her on her play mat in the living room and went back to the driveway when he saw Scully had not followed him inside. She was sitting, still in the passenger side of the car, sobbing.

He opened the door and she spilled into his arms, her seat belt cutting into her collar bone. "Scully, it's going to be okay." He rubbed her back, unbuckled the restraint and tugged it out from under her arm. "Come inside, please." She let him lead her in the house, limply hanging off of him. He sat her on the couch, and was about to go put on some tea, when her choked voice stopped him.

"It's not fair, Mulder." He turned, she was looking at him with red rimmed eyes, her mascara running a little.

"I know," he told her, moving back to the couch to sit next to her.

"I've had three children in my life, and I've only had the opportunity to keep one of them – to experience the joy of raising her with you. All of my children have been in some way...defective."

"Don't say that Scully." He tried to pull her into an embrace, but she pushed back.

"It's true!" She yelped, and Evelynne stirred. "It is true, and you know it. Emily was so sick, she was just a lab rat-"

"Scully, she was the result of scientific tests. She was an experiment. She was a beautiful child, and having her in our lives would have made them better, but she wasn't born to live."

"William, William should have been ours, Mulder!"

"I know, he was."

"But he was always in danger. He was different, too. He would have died if I had kept him."

"I know."

"I had to give him up. My beautiful boy." Mulder rubbed her back as she buried her face in his chest, crying harder. "And then we get Evie. She's a blessing, I know. She was a miracle we never thought we would have. Are we being punished for something? Were we not supposed to procreate?"

"Scully, she's still a miracle. She's a gift – from God, or science, or the government, I don't know. But she's a gift, and we've faced worse than blindness. She's not _defective_, Scully, she special. And she's ours. And she's here, with us. We can raise her together, we can do this. _You _can do this." He pulled her tighter to him, kissed the crown of her head.

Scully tipped her face back to look at him, still crying lightly. "I'm sorry I used that word. I didn't mean it."

"I know that," he said, bending over to kiss her lips.

"Of course I know she's a gift. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I just...we have the worst luck when it comes to having a family."

Mulder sighed, ran his hands over Scully's arms a few times. "Let me go put some tea on. You need to relax." When he left the living room and went to the kitchen, Scully got up and walked over to Evelynne.

"I love you, baby." One finger stroked over the soft expanse of skin on the baby's cheek, her eyelids fluttered open momentarily and shut again. A soft hush of air rushed out of her mouth. Scully lay down next to the infant, closed her eyes, and promptly fell asleep.

********M&S********

"Hi mom, it's Fox." Mulder had found Scully sleeping on the floor and scooped her up, carried her to bed, placing Evelynne next to her. Now he was reclining in the bed next to them, gently twirling the small tuft of hair on Evelynne's head around his finger. "Um, I'm not sure if everything's okay. Scully's been worried about Evie's eyesight lately, so we took her to a paediatric ophthalmologist. He diagnosed Evie with infantile blindness." Scully moaned in her sleep, rolled over, placing a hand on his chest. "I figured you would want to know right away. Scully's sleeping right now, today really wore her out. Yeah, she's pretty upset over the whole thing." Evelynne was snuggled tightly between the two of them, her drool moistening Mulder's t-shirt. "I'll tell her I called you. Okay, yeah. I love you, too. Talk to you later." He hung up the phone and rolled on his side so he was facing Scully. "Scully?" He bent down so he was close to her face, rubbed her arm.

"Huh?" She opened her eyes a little, looked around the bedroom before making eye contact with Mulder. "Where am I?"

He laughed gently. "Our bedroom. I found you asleep on the floor, so I brought you two in here." He ran his hand down her side, delighting in the curve of her waist to her hip. They hadn't done anything since Evie had been born. He missed his wife's body. "Do you want some dinner?"

Scully sat up a stretched, letting out a low groan as she did so. "How long have I been out?"

"About four hours. You _must _be hungry. I am."

She nodded. "I'm going to take a shower, I think."

Mulder scooped up Evelynne and took her into the kitchen with him, dropping her into the baby seat on the table. "What should we have for dinner tonight?" he asked her, pressing his index finger to her nose quickly, watching a smile grow on her face. "Hmm...spaghetti? Steak? What do you think mommy's in the mood for?"

Scully's voice traveled out of the bedroom, "Spaghetti!" Mulder looked up just in time to her naked leg going back into the room.

"Spaghetti it is," he told his daughter. He continued to talk to her as he prepared supper, she contributed a constant chatter throughout. After a while, Scully came out of their room, her wet hair pulled back into a ponytail, one of Mulder's shirt draped over her thin form. She had lost all of the baby weight immediately, without trying. Dr. Grey had voiced her jealously on more than one occasion. Mulder pulled Scully into a hug, kissed the top of her head and held out a spoon with spaghetti sauce on it. "What do you think?" he asked her, delighting in the way her delicate lips closed around the spoon, licked off every last drop of the sauce. Only his Dana Scully could look so erotic at a time like this.

"Delicious." She smiled up at him and then turned to talk to her baby. "Hello, beautiful. Hello! How are you?" She held one tiny foot in her hand, let her thumb trail over the sensitive skin there. Evelynne jerked her foot back, but giggled none the less as she was tickled. "Did I hear you on the phone while I was sleeping?" Scully asked Mulder while she was still trailing her nail over Evelynne's skin, tickling the baby.

"Yeah, I called your mom. I'm sorry. But I thought she would want to know right away."

"It's okay. You're probably right. And I don't know..." she took a breath, "if I'm really ready to face this yet. Saying it out loud will make it seem real."

"Scully...Dana...we need to face this. _You _need to face this. I can help you, I want to help you. But this isn't something we can just brush under the carpet. Our lives are going to change. I did some research while you were sleeping. I...everything we do, everything I ever knew about raising a child, it's all different when a child is born blind."

"I understand the severity of the situation, Mulder." Her voice was steely, her back was to him, but he saw her hand still on Evelynne's elbow.

"I didn't mean to make you angry." He turned the stove off before he burned the sauce.

"I know." Her shoulders slumped and she turned to him. "I know that I have to deal with this right now. I know everything will change." Scully swallowed thickly, and looking for something to do, picked up the pot of pasta, and poured it into the strainer over the sink. "I feel so terrible. Could we have prevented this, Mulder? It's eating me up inside. Is this my fault? Or is it the tests that were done on me? Or on you?"

"Scully," he took the pot from her hands and put it in the sink, grabbed both of her hands and held them, "I don't remember anything that happened when I was abducted. Maybe _they _did do something. Maybe they didn't. Either way, these are the cards we've been dealt, and this is the way things are going to be. Why should we place blame?"

"Excuse me?" She pulled her hands away from him. "Are you even the Fox Mulder I knew? Where's the man I fell in love with? The man who always wanted to know the truth? There's no blame here, only a search for an answer. You of all people should understand that." She was worried, this didn't sound like Mulder – why was he so indifferent to the entire situation? He had been all day. "Mulder, what's going on? What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing Scully, I'm not keeping anything from me."

"Fox William Mulder." She poked him in the chest. "You _are _keeping something from me. The man I _thought _I knew would already be hunting for answers. He would be searching for the reason his _daughter's _life had been turned upside down. He would certainly NOT be cooking pasta in the kitchen!"

"Scully!" He back away from her, bumped into the counter. "Scully, I was just...I was going to start looking, tomorrow. I wanted to give you time. Give you time to deal with this. I need you...to help me look. To help me find the answers."

"No, that doesn't make sense. Why would you be waiting?" She felt like maybe she was being paranoid. His answer made some sense, but she still wasn't sure.

"Look, Scully," he reached out a tentative hand to rub her shoulder, but she pulled away from him. "When we found out today, that Evie was blind, you were so shocked. You were so upset. I've rarely seen you like that. I didn't know how to react. I thought the best thing would be to take control of the situation, and get you home. I figured you could deal with it and be back to yourself by the time we got here. But you were still so angry, so sad, I just wanted to...be there for you. Okay? I'm angry, too. I'm extremely mad. I'd even go so far as to say I was livid. I want the truth, too. I want to know why this happened – why someone tried to destroy our miracle. I won't let them, Scully. I'm going to find out what happened, I'm going to find out for you. And for Evie." She stared at him for a moment and took a nervous step forward. Finally she crumpled against his chest.

"Mulder," she whispered, "never, ever worry about my feelings again."

He laughed quietly - she could feel the vibration in his chest. "Sorry, Scully. I was trying a new tactic."

"You scared the shit out of me."

"Yeah, I know that now." He let her go and grabbed two plates from the cupboard. And so they sat down to eat, Evelynne between them, bouncing in her seat, the trio ready to fight a new battle as one.

********M&S********

"Scully?"

"Mmm?"

"I think Evie's asleep." Mulder's hand snaked up Scully's leg, danced to her inner thigh, made the heat move down her abdomen.

"Me, too," she whispered, rolling over to face him. The moonlight cast a light glow across his face, he was smiling at her. Scully sat up momentarily, let him pull the t-shirt of her body.

"You're so hot," he purred, leaned in to put his lips to her clavicle. He let his tongue dart out, hot in the cool air of their room, and dance over her skin. She dipped her head, wrapped her fingers in his hair and guided him to her mouth. He kissed her hungrily, pushing his tongue into her mouth. Before soon, she was tugging at his pyjama pants, wanting to free the arousal that was pressing at her leg. He pulled back, helped her tug the garment off, before continuing his ministrations, moving down her neck. She shuddered, felt a shiver run down her spine.

"Mulder," she said, pushing him back, "lay down." It wasn't an offer, it was a command. He moaned, letting her climb over his body. His hands reached up, running over her milky, smooth arms. She straddled him, just below his knees and bent so that she could kiss him. _It's been so long_. She trailed heat down his body, wet lips kissing every inch on the way down. She swirled circles around his nipples, making him arch his back, groan, pleading for more. One of her hands moved to his erection, palming him, teasing him.

"Sculleee...." this was painful, after three months of no sex. She smiled up at him, continued her trail south, and took him in her mouth. He thought he might explode. Slowly, her mouth a vacuum, she bobbed her head up and down, only breaking eye contact once when she almost lost her balance. Mulder let his hands tangle in her hair, it had grown long in the past year. "Scully," he panted, "so close."

She licked him from base to tip, and left his stiff cock wet and cold as she slithered up his body, and whispered in his ear, "Me too." He grabbed a hold of her hips, helped to guide her body down on top of him and was lost in sweet oblivion. Mulder reached a hand down between them, a natural rhythm established already, her slow rocking back and forth, his rapidly increasing hand movements. He loved it when she rode cowgirl style. He could see her face as she came, when she leaned her head back, moaned his name, her finger nails scratched across the surface of his chest.

He was quick to follow, and she collapsed on top of him. The sound of a baby crying roused him from his post coital haze. "Not a moment too soon," he said, rolling over and depositing Scully on the bed. His pants were somewhere on the floor, he found them and tugged them on before Scully had the sense of mind to get up.

"Mulder, it's my turn," she insisted, albeit half heartedly.

"It's okay," he cupped her cheek, kissed her quickly. "You'll pay me back somehow."

*******M&S********

"Happy Birthday baby!" Scully kissed the tip of Evelynne's nose, placed her in the high chair by the table. They had had some trouble getting Evelynne to sit up, but finally the one year old was doing it herself, independent of her mother's assistance. Rebecca Grey was in the kitchen with them, sitting across the table from Evelynne, her two boys were running around the house, fighting with foam swords, shrieking with laughter.

"Happy birthday!" Rebecca and Mulder chimed in. He handed Scully a slice of cake, from which she scooped a spoonful of the spongy food.

"First slice goes to the birthday girl," she said, moving the spoon to Evelynne's mouth. Her daughter opened up obediently, took the cake in her mouth, and swallowed happily before opening her mouth. "That's all you get today, baby." Scully laughed at her daughter, whose mouth was still open. Rebecca leaned across the table and put a finger in the baby's mouth, much to Evelynne's surprise.

"John, Marcus, come get some cake!" Mulder yelled, putting two small sliced on the table before he sat down, gave one to Rebecca and started devouring his own. The boys ran into the kitchen, dropped their swords on the floor and clambered onto their chairs.

"Thanks, Mr. Johnston," they intoned upon seeing the look on their mother's face.

"You're welcome," he grinned at them.

"So, I know you two said I didn't need to get anything for Evie, but I wanted to," Rebecca had a glint in her eye.

"Oh, Rebecca, I told you..." Scully set down her plate, and took Evie – who had begun to cry – out of her high chair.

"I know, I know. I wanted to, though." She pulled a small, wrapped package out of her purse, and handed it to Mulder, who began to tear off the paper.

"Thank you," Scully admitted defeat, brushing tears off her daughter's face.

"This is great," Mulder said, flipping through the book Rebecca had gotten for them. Scully leaned over to look at it.

"It's a book about farm animals," Rebecca explained, "but it's one of those touch and feel ones. I thought it would be a great way for Evie to interact with you while you're reading it to her."

"That's so sweet," Scully said, reaching out to pet the "feathers" on the picture of a duck. "Thank you so much, Rebecca."

"It was my pleasure."

********M&S********

**4 years later**

"Daddy, where are we?" Mulder was unbuckling Evelynne from her booster seat in the back of the SUV.

"I told you we were going to the grocery store. Can you hear the shopping carts?" The five year old was silent for a moment, didn't move as she listened closely.

"Yes," she finally said, "I can hear them now." Mulder picked her up, and set her down next to him, shut the car door and locked it. He held his hand out for her, and she felt around in the air for a few seconds, found his finger and finally grasped his hand. "Can I ride in the cart today?" she asked him, facing ahead.

"I think so," he dropped a loonie into the buggy, freeing it from the lock. "Hold on a sec," he let go of her hand, "I'm right here, I'm just getting the cart out." Once he had it away from the rest of the carts, he dropped her into the child seat. Although most five year olds would be uncomfortable in the small space, Evelynne had been a very petite child, taking after her mother, and still fit quite easily.

"Where's mommy?" she asked him as he pushed the cart into the store.

"She had to work late today," he told her, "one of her patients, a little boy, is very sick. Why? You don't like shopping for groceries with me?"

She giggled. "I do! I just wanted to know where mommy was." The cart stopped moving and she could hear her father picking something out. "What are you buying?" she asked him.

"Oranges. Would you like to hold one?" She nodded and he passed her one.

"Hey!" She said, letting her hands roll over the smooth surface. "This isn't an orange."

"Can you tell what it is?"

"It's round, like an orange, but it's smooth like an apple."

"Mhm," he started pushing the cart again.

"It feels hard..."

"It's not ripe," he explained, "that's why it's hard. Usually it would be soft."

"Is it a plum?"

"Yup." She held it out so he could take it from her. "Behind you," he told her, "there's a bag. Can you put it in there for me, please?" She rummaged behind her, bending her back awkwardly. Her hand touched only air.

"I don't think I can reach," she whined.

"Yes you can, try your other hand." Finally she found the bag and dropped the plum in. "You need to be careful when you drop things," Mulder said, picking a can up off the shelf. "You don't know how far that fell, what if you had bruised it?"

"Sorry." She reached up and he kissed her hand.

"It's okay." They walked in silence for a few moments, when suddenly Evelynne felt her father's face very close to hers. "If I was to, oh...I don't know...race around the store, you wouldn't tell mommy, would you?" She laughed and shook her head. "Alright," he said, standing up, "get ready." Before she had time to brace herself, she was flying through the store, heard the clanging of the wheels as her father turned sharp corners, running faster and faster with the buggy. She couldn't help it, peels of laughter escaped her throat.

"Daddy!" She laughed, holding tightly to the handle bar in front of her. They stopped just as suddenly.

"Whoops," he said. She knew that voice – that was his 'in trouble' voice.

"Can I help you sir?" Another man's voice.

"Oh, no, I'm okay, just in a bit of a rush." And that was his 'about to laugh' voice.

"Alright then." Evelynne listened as footsteps got quieter and quieter, waited until her dad started to laugh, and then joined in.

"Why do we always seem to get in trouble?" he asked her, ruffling her hair. She just laughed at him.

********M&S********

Scully handed Mulder a travel mug of coffee. "I wish they would stop giving you all these four o' clock in the morning shifts. It's just bad timing." He bent over to kiss her, put a hand on her abdomen – another unborn member of the Mulder clan keeping her belly warm.

"I told them," he said, straightening, "that when you get into your third trimester they need to give me either the night shift or the day shift, so you can always know when I won't be home. But until then, Scully, it's hard to be picky."

"I know," she put her hands on her lower back, grinned at him. "You're coming to the ultra sound today, though, right?"

He nodded, "I asked Davis to cover me for an hour. I'll meet you there."

She kissed him one last time before opening the door for him, ushering him into the cool, night air. Mulder closed the door behind him and Scully watched through the window as he started the car and pulled into the street. Once she had turned off the porch light, decided she needed some tea before going back to sleep, she hear a piercing scream. As fast as her feet could carry her, she hurried to Evelynne's room, sidestepping toys on the way. Her daughter was sitting up in bed, tears streaming down her face, her mouth open, letting out a loud howl.

"Honey, baby, Evie, what's wrong?" Scully sat down on the bed next to her, pulled the crying child's head to her chest. "Did you have a nightmare?" Evelynne nodded and sniffed. "It was just a dream, honey, it will be okay." She scratched her daughter's back through her pyjamas and cooed quietly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Evelynne pulled back and wiped at her running nose with a balled fist. "I had a dream about Daddy," she spoke quietly, Scully had to strain to understand the words.

"Don't use your sleeve honey, take a tissue." Scully handed Evelynne a tissue. "What happened? Were you scared of Daddy in the dream?"

"No," she shook her head, wiped at her eyes with the tissue. "I was scared _for _him."

"Why?"

"He was at work, Mommy. At first I could just hear him, like all my normal dreams. He was yelling at someone to 'put the gun down'. I don't think they were listening, because he kept saying it over and over again. He said 'I'm a police officer, put the gun down or I'll shoot.' Then, I hear a loud popping noise, and I saw him, Mommy!"

"What do you mean, you _saw _him? Evie, you're blind."

"I know that!" Evelynne pushed her fist into the bed. "I don't know if he ever looks like that, but I saw something. I saw this light around a big, Daddy sized shape. A bright, coloured light. Beside it, there was another, dark shadow. And then the shadow started to crawl all over the light around Daddy, and then the light around Daddy went out."

"Light? I...it went out?" Scully felt nervous.

Evelynne nodded. "But it's just a dream, right?"

"Yeah," Scully nodded. "I'm sure it was just a nightmare. I need to tell your father to stop talking about work when you're at the table." She kissed Evelynne on the forehead and laid her down, tucking the blanket around her daughter tightly. "You go back to sleep, honey. Just call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay." Scully began to leave the room when Evelynne called her one more time.

"Mommy?"

"Yes?"

"Sorry I scared you."

"You didn't scare me honey. I just don't like to see my baby cry."

Evelynne nodded and rolled over onto her side to sleep.


End file.
